No Bullies in Karate
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|  5. No one is alone.
Bullies Feel they can continue the bullying because their victim does not do anything about it. In many cases the bully has focused on something that the victim may feel self-conscience about. It could be someone's weight, appearance, glasses, etc. the point is that in many cases the person being bullied may feel embarrassed and won't do anything about it. Be clear and make it clear to someone under this personal attack that all these feelings of insecurity belong to the bully. Understanding this and or helping someone else understand this will be empowering. A great tip for parents is even before any bulling begins, discuss this with your children and have them explain back to you how they might help a friend understand and deal with a bully. 6. Monitor your children online. These days even children in elementary school will show an interest in creating a Facebook or email account. I would not suggest that a child of this age should be using the internet for this purpose. but at some point it is appropriate and your child will be online. When they are, be sure to monitor their activity closely and to limit their social media friends and other contacts to only people they have positive relationship with offline. Be aware of the amount of time your child is spending online and pay close attention to their emotions and behaviors while engaging in this activity. Support your child and keep the lines of communication open. |
Bullying at School, Social Networks and Karate Training
Of constant interest to school aged children and their parents is the problem of bullying. The increase in the use of social networks among students from the earliest grades through high school, has made it easy for bullying to be carried on, almost without direct contact. A typical example of how bullying seriously affected a ten or eleven year old boy who was constantly teased and bullied in school and via one of his contacts on his social network is described in the following paragraphs.
The boy’s father recognized that there was something wrong and after discussing it with his son, discovered how the bullying and teasing that he experienced at school was the cause of the problem.
The father determined to teach his son how to fight back. He gave his son a series of boxing lessons at home that would enable him to protect himself from the teasers. When the father determined that his son had progressed enough to handle the situation he admonished him not to go out and beat up the teasers, but he added, “If anyone lays a hand on you, you have my permission to get all over him”.
With these skills in hand, the son returned to school, but the teasing did not stop. Within a few weeks, and with the encouragement of a contact via his social network, the boy tragically took his own life.
The father’s decision to give his son the skills to protect himself seemed like as positive thing to do and certainly the positive relationship that was built up between father and son while he was receiving the lessons was a good thing as well. It made me wonder what it was about the situation that made it end so tragically. What was missing?
Through the years, I have watched young boys and girls gaining the skills to protect themselves as they took Karate lessons at the Tom Bloom Karate Studio. I watched them gain confidence in themselves as they learned to concentrate in order to execute the various moves required to progress in the program. But even more importantly, I watched them become a part of something they learned to do with their peers and so they came to feel equal to their peers.
This thought was, perhaps, best expressed in a letter I received from the mother of a boy who had been born with spastic cerebral palsy on one side and was also considered to be retarded. He was brought to the studio for training and joined in the classes. After some time he had progressed far enough to be able to participate in a tournament, at which, to his great disappointment, he did not win a trophy. He wanted to drop out of Karate training, but his mother insisted that he continue.
She wrote: “He came out of that first class smiling. You all made him feel okay about what he had done and gave him some very instructive pointers.”
She went on to conclude: “I’ve seen such a turn around since beginning Karate. He feels like all of you like him and want to help him. His angry behavior towards everyone had really dissipated and he’s improved 100% in his studies at school. He feels stronger and says nobody teases him. Little kids look up to him – and he feels a part of a place. Thank you.”
The environment at Tom Bloom Karate is inclusive. Students learn to fight for something, not against anything or anyone. They learn to fight to better themselves and those around them. That is the goal of the Martial Artist and those are the goals at Tom Bloom Karate.
~Professor Bloom, World Karate Champion